Back to the real world?

Marshall and I officially moved back to Oklahoma from Houston about a month ago. The transition from full time hospital life to the "real world" has been an interesting one. In one sense, it does feel like we are getting back to our old life but, in most ways that isn't an option.

Our church is dissolved, our house is unlivable (literally), our friends are moving away, and we have lost two close family members in the last month.  We are dealing with the reality of long term effects of cancer treatment on Marshall's body and feeling how much we missed out on in the lives of our family and friends. It feels now, we had it more "normal" in Houston.

I don't want this to be understood in a way that encourages pity. We have been blessed beyond compare in our suffering. I have had a year alone with my husband and haven't left left his side in 18 months. These are precious times I would not trade for anything.

But, my struggle is in how to connect our life we have made this last year and half with the lives of those we love. Through all of this, the only helpful thing to question is what the Lord is teaching us in these trials... not how to go back to where and what we were.

You can't go back, and that breaks the nostalgic heart in me.

But, His promises and goodness still rein and guide us in this new season. That is my hope and joy.

(Marshall and I when we were engaged )

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